Helping Foster Children Explore New Foods

Food is a personal thing. Some foods can offer comfort in uncertainty and help us feel good on a bad day, while others provide mental clarity and give us energy to focus and exercise.  

Food can be an emotive topic, and if you’re worried about whether the child in your care is getting all the nutrients they need, we’re here to help. In this article, we explore the reasons why foster children may have challenges with food and provide tips on how you can help the child in your care discover new flavours so they can benefit from a well-balanced diet. 

trying new foods

Why won’t my foster children try any food? 

As a foster carer, you may spend a lot of time planning and preparing meals to ensure the child in your care receives a well-balanced diet. However, no matter how hard you try, encouraging them to eat the food you’ve so lovingly prepared can be easier said than done.  

Every child can go through periods of food fussiness. However, for children in care, there may be a lot more going on beneath the surface that makes trying new food more complex.  

So, before we look at ways you can help the child in your care explore new foods, we need to recognise the reasons why they may find their relationship with food challenging. 

 

Early experiences of food 

Imagine you’re a child in care who has experienced neglect. You may have spent many years of your early life wondering when you would have your next meal or surviving on a poorly balanced diet.  

If food was scarce, you might have had no choice but to find ways to meet your own basic nutritional needs – for example, by eating as much as possible when food was available or taking a little extra and saving it for the next day.  

You may even have become so accustomed to a lack of food that now you don’t have much of an appetite at all or struggle to try new foods because the choice, new flavours and unfamiliar textures are overwhelming. 

Children who’ve had these sorts of experiences may: 

  • Take extra food and hide it in their bedroom so they know they’ll always have something to eat. 
  • Overeat or eat to the point of feeling sick because they are worried about feeling hungry again. 
  • Seem preoccupied with food – constantly looking in the fridge or cupboard, or asking when they’ll next have something to eat.
  • Not recognise when they are hungry or full.
  • Only want to eat one type of food.
  • Eat faster than everyone else – they may use their hands instead of cutlery to eat more quickly.
  • Eat off other people’s plates or take food out of their classmates’ lunchboxes
  • Compulsively eat even when they aren’t hungry
  • Eat uncooked food like dried pasta.
  • Be reluctant to share food with others. 
  • Struggle to try new food textures, smells, and flavours. 

Emotional challenges of food 

The way we feel can often impact our appetite. You probably have a go-to food that brings you comfort when you’re feeling sad, and if you’re anxious, eating might be the last thing on your mind.  

When a child moves into care, they have to leave everything behind – the only home they’ve known, their family, belongings and community. The impact of this upheaval, along with their experiences at home, can profoundly impact their emotions. They may feel a sense of loss and grief, as well as fear and anxiety about the future – all of which can affect their appetite.  

They might lose interest in food entirely or become attached to a particular type of food that reminds them of home. Some children may also see eating as something that’s within their control. They had no say in the experiences that led them into care or the move itself, but they can decide what goes into their body.  

foster child cooking

Sensory challenges 

Children who are hypervigilant or neurodiverse can be sensitive to sensory input such as smells, textures, sounds, and the way food looks on their plate. This can make it more difficult for them to tolerate new flavours, smells, and textures of foods.  

They may like two types of foods, but when they’re mixed or served on the same plate, they may refuse to eat them. For example, they may like toast and beans, but when served together, the combination of wet and dry foods could be overwhelming or unappetising for them.  

They may also have a phobia of trying new foods or struggle to identify when they’re hungry, making it difficult for them to receive the nutrients they need.  

Tips for helping children try new foods 

If every mealtime feels like a battle, it’s important to identify the root cause of your child’s behaviour so you can adapt meals to suit your child’s needs.  

One way you can do this is by using the ABC model. The ABC model can help you identify patterns in your child’s behaviour, helping you look beyond the surface and understand what’s really going on. You can then make adjustments to make mealtimes a more positive experience for the child in your care. 

Below are some adjustments you can make to encourage children to try new food and build healthier eating habits.  

Tips for helping children try new foods

Discuss their food preferences 

When your foster child moves in, find out what they like to eat at home and stick to those familiar foods while they settle in. You could also ask them if they prefer their meals to be prepared in a particular way – for example, keeping different types of food on separate plates.  

Make sure you know whether the child in your care has any allergies or intolerances or if they follow a particular diet due to personal or religious reasons.  

Wherever possible, serve the same meal to everyone so your foster child feels part of the family. In those first few days, focus on building trust and getting to know each other rather than encouraging healthy eating habits. 

Gradually introduce new foods 

Giving a child a meal with ingredients they’ve never tried before can be incredibly overwhelming. Instead, you could gradually introduce new foods by providing a smaller taster place alongside their main meal.  

Let them explore the foods at their own pace. Even if they don’t eat the new foods at first, this gives them a chance to see, feel, and smell the food. It can take 10 to 15 tries before a child begins to like a particular food, so if they try it and don’t like it, continue offering it on a smaller plate. 

Simplify meals  

You don’t have to cook complicated meals to ensure your foster child receives the right balance of each food group – you can simply assemble a meal instead. This means putting each food group on the plate (or separate plates if they prefer), rather than mixing them together to create a typical meal.  

You could also lay out a variety of options on the table and let the family pick and choose the types of food they’d like to try. This can be a great approach for children who dislike foods being mixed together, served with sauces, or who are sensitive to textures and added flavours like herbs and spices. It’s also a brilliant time-saver and can help reduce food waste.  

Get them involved  

You can help build an interest in trying new foods by encouraging the child in your care to get involved in planning and preparing meals. Every week or month, you could ask them to choose a new recipe for the family to try before writing a shopping list together. You could then challenge them to find the various ingredients around the supermarket before cooking the meal as a team. When they sit down to eat the meal, they’ll feel a sense of accomplishment for eating something they helped cook.  

If you foster a younger child, another great way to keep them engaged in trying new foods is by creating a food chart – a poster of different food types they can tick off as they try them. If you foster an older child, you could help them make a recipe book of all the meals they’ve tried and tested, which will come in handy when they leave care. 

Routine and repetition  

Children thrive on routine and stability, so whether it’s a weekend or a weekday, try to stick to a consistent mealtime schedule. If your child seems to struggle at the dinner table in the evening but seems happy enough during breakfast and lunch, they may simply be tired. A slight adjustment to mealtimes might be all they need to have the energy to engage in new flavours, textures, and smells.  

You could also start by introducing new foods at lunchtime during weekends, when things are typically more relaxed, before offering new foods in the evening after school.  

If they have a small appetite, make sure they’re getting enough exercise during the day and aren’t snacking too much between meals, so they feel hungry when it’s time to eat.  

Create food security 

If the child in your care hoards food or seems preoccupied with when their next meal will be served, try to create a sense of food security.  

If they tend to overeat when food is available, offer smaller portions and reassure them that more food is available if they’re still hungry. You could also involve them in creating a basket of healthy snacks they can dip into whenever they want.  

This way, they’ll know they can access food whenever they’re hungry, so they don’t need to save food for later or eat as much as possible during mealtimes. 

Get support 

If you’re concerned about your foster child’s relationship with food, reach out for support. At FCA Scotland, we’re proud of our support for children in foster care, ensuring that we listen to their views and always put them at the centre of their care.  

Our Team Parenting model means you have access to professionals such as therapists, social workers, and education leads who can help you nurture every aspect of your foster child’s well-being. 

You may also find it useful to talk to other foster carers in your local area. Our foster carers have a wealth of experience and may be able to recommend some strategies that have worked for them. 

 

Whether you’re new to fostering or looking to transfer and want to learn more about the positive impact you could have on children in care across Scotland, please get in touch. 

Preparing for Christmas with Teenage Foster Children

When you think of Christmas, images of mince pies, mistletoe and festive feasts may spring to mind, but for the teenager in your care, it may feel significantly different – they could be dreading the festive season. But we’re here to help you prepare for Christmas with your teenager so they can look forward to celebrating and making new happy memories with you and your family.  

The challenges of Christmas for fostered teenagers 

Whether you’ve been fostering a child who’s now a teenager or have just welcomed a teenager into your home, Christmas can provoke strong emotions. It can emphasise feelings of being different from their peers, and experiencing Christmas without their family could intensify a sense of loss and grief. It could also bring difficult memories to the surface if past Christmases with their birth family have been challenging.  

While you can’t prevent your teenager from experiencing distressing emotions about Christmas, you can put them at ease and support them by making plans that consider their individual needs and nurture their well-being. Here are our tips to help you prepare so your teenager feels safe, loved and understood during the Christmas period, into the New Year and beyond. 

Christmas with Teenage Foster Children

Have an open conversation 

One of the best ways to prepare for a Christmas that supports your teenager’s well-being is to talk openly with them about Christmas as early as possible. If you watch TV together and a Christmas advert is shown, this could be a good conversation starter. You could ask them how they feel about Christmas or their favourite thing about the festive period.  

They may not want to engage in conversation, but by approaching the topic, you provide them with a safe space to express their feelings when they are ready. If they are anxious about upcoming celebrations, reassure them and remind them that they can always come to you if things get too much.  

Remain curious and be mindful that their behaviour may tell you everything you need to know about their feelings. If you need extra support, you can always discuss your concerns with your supervising social worker or get advice from other foster carers.  

 

Let them make some decisions 

Whether they tell you or not, teenagers often want more input in decisions that impact them, especially if they are close to adulthood. So, include your teenager in the preparations for Christmas. If this is the first Christmas with your teenager, ask them to share any traditions they’d like to include. If you’ve been fostering your teenager for a while, see if they’d like to swap any of your usual traditions for new ones.  

You could decide what will be on the menu together. They may have seen some recipes online they’d like to try or could prefer something straightforward if they aren’t used to a lavish festive feast. You could also encourage them to feel part of your family by asking them to help you select gifts for each family member.  

Including your teenager in Christmas preparations could help them feel effective and like they belong. It will additionally teach them how to make decisions for themselves, which will be incredibly useful when they leave care. 

Organise teen-friendly activities 

The magic of Christmas isn’t reserved for small children; it can still be found in the eyes of teenagers who’ve never had the opportunity to experience festive fun. So, organise some teen-friendly Christmas activities, and if you have young children, be conscious that your teenager may not want to tag along to Santa’s grotto.  

If your teenager is comfortable with crowds, you could attend a local Christmas market or ice skate at a temporary outdoor rink. Although it’s nice to spend time as a family, your teenager may like to take a friend, so make arrangements far enough in advance to facilitate this.  

Always run ideas for activities by your teenager before making concrete plans, and check in with them regularly to ensure they still want to participate. They may prefer a quiet Christmas at home where they feel safe and comfortable, so a Christmas movie marathon, crafts or baking could be a great alternative. 

Teenage Foster Children Xmas

Buy thoughtful gifts 

If your teenager has come from a home of abuse or neglect, you may be tempted to shower them with gifts to make them happy on Christmas day. However, it could be incredibly overwhelming if they’ve not experienced it before, and they may feel uncomfortable receiving so much attention. Instead, focus on buying a few thoughtful gifts that show your teenager that you understand their personality and interests.  

If you’ve only recently begun fostering a teenager, you could ask them to write a list of ideas or talk to other foster carers for inspiration. But, to get you started, here are our ideas for Christmas presents for a teenager in foster care:  

  • Personalised gifts – If you haven’t had time to figure out exactly what your teenager would like, personalised items could be the ideal option. Writing their name on a mug, water bottle, or necklace shows that you’ve put effort into buying something just for them. 
  • Gift cards – If you’re really struggling with ideas, gift cards could be a good choice. They are more personal than cash and, in the New Year, you could take them on a shopping trip to buy exactly what they want. 
  • Bedroom accessories – If your teenager has recently moved in, you could buy them some accessories for their bedroom, like fluffy blankets, LED lights and personalised bedding.  
  • Self-care items – They may feel anxious, so support their well-being by buying them self-care items that help them feel rested and relaxed, such as an eye mask, bath bombs, bubble bath, a journal or a book of daily affirmations.  

Discuss boundaries  

When the Christmas holidays arrive, your teenager may want to stay up later, sleep in, and take a break from their usual routine. Relaxing their routine slightly can be beneficial, but it’s essential to maintain regular mealtimes and ensure they go to bed at a reasonable hour. This consistency will help them feel safe and stable during the festive season, even if they don’t consciously realise it. 

It’s also a good idea to discuss holiday boundaries with your teenager ahead of time. For instance, establish a limit on how long they can spend on social media and remind them that these limits are set for their own well-being. Don’t forget to take their perspective into account as well. If they’ve previously lived in an environment where alcohol was misused, you may need to exclude alcohol from Christmas celebrations to ensure they feel safe. 

Plans may change 

When fostering teenagers at Christmas, their well-being is the top priority, so you may need to prepare for any last-minute changes to your plans. Reassure your teenager that if they don’t feel up to doing something, that’s perfectly okay, and have some backup ideas ready just in case.  

If your teenager struggles to cope during the festive season, reach out—our support for foster carers is available 24/7. If you’re new to your role, talk to one of our carer buddies or other foster carers in your area; their wealth of experience and knowledge could help steer you in the right direction. 

Remember: Even if your Christmas doesn’t go to plan, your teenager will spend the festive season in a home where they’re safe, loved and appreciated, something they may never have experienced before. 

If you’re thinking about fostering, get in touch. Our team will provide advice and guidance on how to foster a child and the process involved. They’ll also help you prepare to foster and can answer any questions you may have about starting your journey. With you on board, we can provide more children in care with a loving home where they can make positive Christmas memories and have the childhood they truly deserve.